news articles 23 october

[Inside Australian Idol]

What's Holden saying?
By Eleanor Sprawson
October 23, 2003




CLASSIC "HOLDENISMS"

"Hubba hubba hubba"
"Holy moley stolle, I need a drink!"
"You're the bomb, dude"
"Bibbity bobbity boom!"
"This guy is the real deal Neil"
"Touchdown!"
"Move over Selwyn, Belwyn and Delwyn, there's a fresh prince in town!"
"You're mighty mighty"



THERE is just one question that plagues the minds of Australian Idol addicts - and it's not who's going to win.

Instead, the cry is simply, "What is going on with Mark Holden?"

"That's all anybody's interested in," says Ian "Dicko" Dickson, one of Holden's fellow judges on Ten's talent juggernaut.

"All I get now is everybody - workmen, schoolgirls, yummy mummies, businessmen - yelling out, 'How is it working with that Holden? Isn't he a wanker!"'

Central to the issue is Holden's increasingly bizarre linguistic inventions (see breakout), which last week reached new heights when the songwriter, producer and 1970s pop sensation went on Rove Live and mystified the nation with utterances like "The reality is, I yanked the shank, man".

"What is he talking about?" asks Dickson, who is the marketing bigwig at record company BMG. "What does it mean? People are beginning to obsess about it. He's turning into a real cult figure."

Indeed, live audiences at the Idol shows are beginning to bristle with posters championing not their favourite singer but their favourite Holden lines ("Hubba hubba hubba!" and "Mighty mighty!" seem to be early crowd pleasers).

It's even beginning to get to Dicko. "We walk around the BMG offices and from the managing director down to the receptionist everyone is greeting each other with Holdenisms," he says.

"If he carries on it's going to enter the Oxford English dictionary, Australian edition, as a Holdenism. And the definition will be 'an inane and inexplicable exhortation'."(Idol stars at the ARIAs)

For his own part, Holden seems flummoxed and slightly alarmed at all the attention. "This is just a by-product of the meltdown of my brain," he says sadly. "It's unintentional, I assure you."

Pressed on the issue, Holden suggests he's become a "cultural mongrel" thanks to years of living in Los Angeles ghetto areas and picking up the street slang.

"But the thing is, I don't actually have as quick a wit as somebody like Dicko has," he says. "Dicko has a razor-sharp, incredible post-punk wit and you know, I'm just a neuron-damaged musician who in moments of passion is stumbling for something to say."

Indeed the third member of the judging triumvirate, Marcia Hines, suspects that it's Dickson's genius for fast one-liners that is freaking Holden out and causing not just the bizarre language but his terrible moments of brain-freeze that are the other big Idol talking point.

Most infamous was his badly-timed bagging of finalist Levi at the contestant's darkest hour last week. 'I think it is nerves," says Hines, as understanding of her fellow judge as she is about the contestants.

"Ian is very, incredibly quick-witted and I think that does get Mark flustered. But if he was smart the best thing he could do is to remain quiet. Don't try to compete if you're not quick-witted. Sometimes, silence is golden."

For himself, however, Dickson reckons it's Holden who's being the smart one. "I'm a little bit pissed off that I didn't think of it," he says.

"Because there is a pressure when you're watching someone perform and they're not bad enough for you to slag them off but they're not great enough for you to gush, then there's this horrible no-man's land where you think, 'What the hell am I going to say about this?' And it gets to the end of the song and you're thinking, 'Bloody hell, just do another verse, I need more time, we're on live telly!' It's tough.

"But Holden, obviously, hit on this fantastic idea of talking s...t. Just coming up with nonsensical moonman language which doesn't mean anything, and ridiculous sports calls - cartoon language.

"And it gets him over the line. I wish I'd thought of it."

The Daily Telegraph


entertainment.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,4459,7629269%255E10431%255E%255Enbv,00.html

[Inside Australian Idol]

Bottom line for Idol
Comment by Matt Price
October 23, 2003


PAULINI Curuenavuli may or not win the Australian Idol croonfest, but the 21-year-old Fijian-born singer has already cemented herself a place in television history.


Paulini in that dress.

Last Sunday evening, having belted out two tunes to wild acclaim from the studio crowd, Curuenavuli stood alone on a small circular stage and learned that her arse was too fat.

In the latest and most dramatic gob-smacking moment of Ten's completely addictive reality/entertainment series, Curuenavuli winced as veteran record company executive Ian "Dicko" Dickson warned the nervous songstress to "choose more appropriate clothing or shed a few pounds".
At which point 2,084,921 jaws dropped around the nation. That's roughly how many people were watching Curuenavuli's live and public humiliation.

Within hours her curves were getting the J-Lo treatment on airwaves and websites around the country.

"What a complete and utter outrage," seemed the majority view as reflected on one (of numerous) Idol fans' chatrooms. "Paulini looked awesome. She had a ghetto booty and she shook it."

"I may get shot down for this," confessed another Idol-iser. "But personally I agree with Dicko. I don't want to see Paulini in anything like that ever again."

There was also the conspiracy theory that Dicko had deliberately dissed Curuenavuli to evoke a tsunami of sympathy and ensure the talented singer progressed to the final four. If this was the judge's intention - very doubtful - it worked. Curuenavuli survived as Millsy, the knockabout Melbourne pub singer, was evicted from TV's most compelling talent quest.

Like most addictions, mine started innocently enough. The children began watching in July, when 10,000 wannabees were pared down to around 100. This was unremarkable humiliation TV generating laughs from the more appalling and deluded contestants.

But a few weeks ago the field was condensed to a dozen talented youngsters and since then the Sunday sing-offs and Monday eliminations have been unmissable. Around 2 million people routinely watch both, and the Thursday night Inside Idol spin-off, which charts the antics and backstage drama of the slowly diminishing bunch, is also popular.

Between Sunday and Monday the public votes for its favourite Idol via phone and SMS. The contestant attracting the least votes leaves the group, who live together in the Idol home.

For a while Ten was farewelling two contestants each Monday, but that's shrunk to one fallen Idol a week. The eventual winner in an Opera House shoot-out next month wins an international recording contract and, for the short term at least, guaranteed fame and, possibly, fortune.

All this merely describes the mechanics of the show; Idol is much, much more. There are several subtle dynamics at play. The Idols have become friends but there'll be just the one winner. Such emotional Darwinism produces tears and heartache each Monday night.

The judges are brilliant. Marcia Hines is Lady Positive, infusing the Idols with love and confidence. Dicko is the industry pro, who prides himself on being a straight shooter. He will oversee the career of the eventual winner.

Mark Holden was once a staple quiz night question; go to the top of the class if you can name three of his four late '70s hits. Now Idol has transformed the ex-teen heart throb cum music producer into a gibbering, annoying but usually well-meaning critic.

There are enough social issues churning around Idol to fuel a raft of PhDs. Rob "Millsy" Mills sailed through to the last five on the votes of a squillion teenage girls. Yet he was easily the least competent singer of the final bunch. Should vocal talent or image prevail? Probably a mix of both.

When Cle was knocked out last month she complained a black girl couldn't possibly win the popular vote. Curuenavuli might prove her wrong - Hines already has - but as the stakes increase the race card could come into play. Idolisers are already split over whether Malaysian-born Guy should wear a beanie over his rampant Afro.

Then there's Curuenavuli's weight. She's not at all fat - around size 12, I'm reliantly informed - just a normal, beautiful, healthy, talented girl. But the music industry is replete with waifs trying to shed kilos; was Dicko being cruel or realistic?

Happily, Ten employs an army of psychologists to assist these kids with the lifelong problem of re-adjusting to normality after months being feted as divas and rock gods. For all their enthusiasm and talent, none strikes me as having obvious long-term star potential.

I'm tipping Guy to win the final against Paulini. And keep your eye on host Andrew G, the enduring star of Idol. If there's a better young presenter on Australian TV, I'll squeeze into Paulini's dress and sing a Mariah Carey song.

[e-mail]

The Australian

[Inside Australian Idol]

Jury out on the Idols
Comment by Idol wannabe Lauren Buckley
October 23, 2003


THERE'S nothing quite as exciting and nerve-wracking as performing live in front of hundreds and thousands of viewers.
Being able to perform is a dream come true, and being able to do it in front of that many people is awesome.

So after a hard week of singing, dancing and preparing for that one shot to impress the voting public, Sunday night comes around way too fast. In the last round, contestants had two chances to make their mark in the week's theme, which was rhythm and blues and soul. They were all great and impressed audiences with their talent although once again, the night ended in controversy.

SHANNON

The country boy from Condoblin sang Higher and Higher. A lot of people were worried he was a "fish out of water" in this week's theme. But his second song, When a Man Loves a Woman was done with such passion that you could feel his emotion. He was fantastic. Given he is primarily a rock singer, his take on R&B was spot on - and the judges agreed.










PAULINI

Unbreak My Heart was her first song and once again, her amazing voice won the audience. Her second song, Survivor, was not her best choice. This song didn't show the range she has in her voice. A more soulful song would have demonstrated her outstanding voice.

GUY

Guy's first song was Hidden Agenda, which he nailed - I think he was better than the original artist, Craig David. His second choice was his own original arrangement of Lionel Ritchie's classic ballad Hello.

This showed his enormous talent and as Marcia said, his voice really is "heaven sent". Every song he sings is sensational and each performance is filled with emotion.

COSIMA

She pulled off I Believe I Can Fly, but it was not her best performance. Her second attempt, Respect was an improvement, but she didn't show her true talent as she has in past weeks.

ROB

I though Millsy nailed his first song, Too Close - it was one of his best performances. He may not have the strongest voice but his performance skills and cheekiness shone through.

His second choice, If I Could Turn Back the Hands of Time was a bit shaky to start, but when he hit those big notes he really pulled it off.

THE VERDICT

I was surprised to see Rob go this week, especially when he had one of his best performances. I just can't figure out the voting.

JUDGE'S CONTROVERSY

As a young woman, I really felt for Paulini. Even if the viewing public did not like what she wore, Dicko's comment that she should "wear more appropriate clothes or shed some pounds" was uncalled for.

This amazing young woman has sung her heart out for months, given up family and friends to do her best.

He should have thought some more before opening his mouth.

PREDICTION

This week's theme, which features a big band, will suit all four of them because it offers a lot of scope. They will have the flexibility to choose songs that suit, and work them in with the orchestra.

While I don't know who will go through to the final three - the voting has been quite unpredictable - I feel that Guy and Paulini are the best performers.

They really set the standard every week and are both such awesome talents, they deserve to go through.

The Daily Telegraph

entertainment.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,4459,7643232%255E10229%255E%255Enbv,00.html

[Inside Australian Idol]

Don’t feel sorry for Paulini

Martin Garfield

Shallow Australian Idol wannabes get a big fat wakeup call from Martin Garfield.


23 October 2003

Let’s get this straight: contestants on a show designed to choose winners and make them into pop stars, so they can be rich, famous, and idol-ised, should be treated with sensitivity about their looks?

All the well-meaning psychologists and former stars who have pitched in and attacked Australian Idol judges Dickson and Holden over their comments about Paulini’s dress need to get real. They were right about the dress - it looked hideous, and they were right to be blunt and point it out.

Idol is one of the shallowest shows on TV, because it is designed to pick budding members of the shallowest part of the entertainment industry- pop stars. It is only one removed from Model Search, and it certainly isn’t about fostering idealism, a positive image, or any other sentimental stuff.

Being a pop star is about generating money for record companies, and for yourself. Top stars like Kylie are constantly in the news, have their butt measurements analysed, and their love life trashed. In exchange, though other people write songs for her she makes tens of millions of dollars, gets A-List invites and dates male models and film stars.

That is what pop music is about. It is the complete opposite to original music; written by the musicians themselves and played live before cranky beer-swilling audiences in a hard, brutal arena of natural selection (corner pubs!) where almost nobody ever gets paid.

Great Aussie original acts, such as INXS, AC/DC, Regurgitator or The Waifs, would never have made it past first base as Australian Idols. Then again, they probably wouldn’t have signed up for the show in the first place.

There is a huge gulf in the music industry (and that is what it is, an industry) between those who still write their own music and those who proffer themselves as pawns to be made up as stars. The latter as I’ve suggested already are little more than models, to be shaped and moulded into manufactured money-generating machines.

Original musicians, on the other hand, do the lot. They have to come up with a ‘sound’, write their own music, polish their performance through hundreds of tough gigs and self-promote as the ultimate guerrilla marketers.

The trade-off is that strict conformity with a single ‘ideal’ image is not so important. Sure, looks certainly count, but there are plenty of ‘voluptuous’, badly dressed or otherwise non-conforming types who have made it regardless, through genuine talent and originality. And most of them probably wouldn’t have cut the mustard as pure pop stars. Imagine trying to package up and sell Peter Garrett, Courtney Love or the Queens of the Stone Age as tweenie idols!

If people are against shallowness and poor role-modelling for young people, then they should rally against the pop industry as a whole. Making Australian Idol all sensitive and PC won’t alter the fact that Kylie works out every day to keep her bum as round and hard as a pair of rockmelons, just as it won’t suddenly introduce a whole bunch of male pop stars with more hair on their backs than their heads.

And as for Paulini, she has two options. If she wants to be a pop star, sold as a commodity to the base end of the market, wrapped up in a manufactured image and someone else’s sound, then she needs to learn to dress herself.

Or she can team up with some muso’s and start a band, write some music, pick an image she is comfortable with, and maybe, just maybe, she will succeed as a true artist. And if she does, she will make herself and the industry suits some money, but she may also give something of value back to music as a whole.

www.crikey.com.au/media/2003/10/23-0005.html