The 70s Show! - Pig Farmer Oinkless Tonight

[Pinkline Jones]

Blimey – is this show EVER going to end? Its not that I’m not enjoying some of the performers but I’m missing valuable valuable pub time.

But this ongoing mish mash of talent and talentlessness demands SOMEONE to cast a critical eye over it because from what I’ve seen (with the exception of Dicko) the judging has been inconsistent, puzzling, wasted and too nicey nice. Dicko, whilst having been clearly wrong on occasions has been for the most part spot on in his analysis; on the other side of the coin - Holden has been a babbling enigma while Marcia has persisted with the Dalai Lama approach “You’ve got a god given gift, you’re so beautiful, couldn’t be more proud."

Tonight's theme was “The 70s” and this setup caught a few out bit time with wrong song choice and failure to give the song the necessary fresh angle. We saw some good performances though highlighted by those of Paulini, Cosima and Kelly:

LEVI

Mr Popular - Levi - opened the show with Stevie Wonder’s “Superstition” and aside from a couple of minor shaky moments he did a very good job of it without it being remarkable. Only comment if he happens to “make it” is that he quickly find a speech coach – There ARE other words in the English language Levi besides "Awesome". But good effort. Hold’s's comments were mysterious as per usual, while Marcia offered her standard softly softly congratulations spiel. 6/10.

LAUREN

The star of Sunnybrook High or somewhere over the local meatworks – Lauren (not carrying her mock modesty tonight – but she IS young) sang “Moondance”. It was a pretty good effort without being exceptional. Dicko claimed she was using only sixty per cent of her ability – I doubt it but I know where he was coming from. On a par with Levi tonight. 6/10

MATT

Dicko was the only judge to hit the nail on the big toe. Matt chose to sing “If” the famous David Gates ballad and if you don’t have an identifiable voice like David Gates then you’d better try something a bit different with it else choose another song. Unfortunately Matt didn’t do anything with the number – not up to reasonable karaoke standard – a sickly and embarrassing contribution . Marcia continued with the Mrs Nice Guy approach by telling Matt that his shyness was endearing. What in the heck are we judging here - a workshop for personality disorders. 4/10

REBECCA

Poor old Rebecca did look a bit tired doing this song by Barry Gibb “Emotion”. To her credit she tried to do it a bit differently but ultimately came across as lost and there was no injection of oomph. Too much ooh ooh oh ooh oh – didn’t help her at all. Dicko was “hugely disappointed”. 4.5/10

ROB

Mr Confidence - Rob – sang “All Right Now” and while he has loads of self-belief the guy is lacking in substance. It was a weak, ordinary effort although the judges thought him a legend and Marcia suggested he must be good because he had the chicks yelling. Well I had the chicks yelling too before the threat of a restraining order so I don’t read much into Marcia’s comment. Karaokeville! 4.5/10

COSIMA

The Eye-Brow Trimmer produced a great effort with “Hot Stuff”. A performance that showcased her dynamics and abilility to “perform”. Clearly one of the best two efforts of the night. Very very very good. Only one thing though – its one thing to BE sexy and another to TRY to be sexy – the jury might be out on that one but she was really good – hard to be critical. 8/10

PETER THE PIGMEISTER

Tabulam’s greatest ever export Peter the Pig Farmer had impressed us in past shows with excellent vocals but tonight he was the real disappointment. Once again Dicko hit the cymbals on the ears – wrong song choice. Elton John’s “Your Song” either showed up Peter’s limitations else he ran out of practice time. I suspect he just made a mistake – you can’t sing everything well. Dicko said bad song choice whilst Marcia said “well done – so calm”. But it WASN’T well done at all – there is a better standard set at your average karaoke - with this song at least. 4.5/10

CLE

The Yo Yo Girl! Brilliant one week and disappointing the next – it was a case of the latter tonight with an oomphless performance of “Young Pigs Run Free”. There was no shortage of sideshow affectation - a breathy mix of disappointment. Dicko however disagreed dubbing the act “sensational” while Holds called Cle “Mighty mighty” – he’s really gotta get off the Pan pharmaceuticals. She was by no means the worst of the night – but definitely capable of a lot better. 5/10

GUY FUZZY HAIR

Sang one of the Jackson 5 songs and was the first singer to venture out to the audience to "communicate" with the crowd – but Guy, mate! – crash tackling an old granny to the floor with a bunch of Mark Holden’s wilted carnations is not a pleasant sight. Guy sang with his usual Stevie Wonderish quiver and does perform well but really only a karaoke standard this evening. Holds thinks Fuzzy Locks is a “supreme artist” – would that be compared to himself? Hard to work out. 5.5/10

KELLY

I think I knocked the rock chick the previous time but tonight she was one of the top three acts with a really top go at “Whole Lotta Love”. Solid singing with the necessary blend of energy produced a top effort. So I take my toupee off to her. 6.5/10

SHANNON

Well it's back to Condoblin I'd say – the third disappointment of the night – with “Help is On Its Way”. Did nothing special with the song and nothing beyond a reasonable karaoke performance. Disappointing as compared to his previous effort. Dicko said that he would have been better off with some other song whilst the other judges thought it was fine. . 5/10

PAULINI

Arguably the best performance of the night (although Cosima was very good) – Paulini delivered the goods with an excellent interpretation of “Don’t Leave Me this Way”. This girl definitely has the “x” factor that the judges talked about – she's just a bit different. The judges were all in agreement and this chick is in NO danger of going out when the votes are counted that’s for sure. Excellent. 8.5/10

Its a cruel world but I'd pick Matt and Rebecca to go out after tonight. I'd give the Pig Farmer another chance - he's too good to go.

[A person]

[kayti]

Levi: OH... MY... GOD. He is the sexiest guy on earth. Tonight he just took it to a completely new level for me - out of the 'homie' clothes and looking very, very nice while at it. Vocally, he wasn't the strongest of the group, but that doesn't matter because he's the whole package. A very well-rounded performer. He can sing and boy, can he MOVE. Reow. Very, very hot.

Lauren: Never been a fan of this girl; to me, she's always lacked star quality, that mysterious x-factor. Vocally, I thought she performed much better than she has in the past; however, she was nervous and it showed. She has a decent voice, but she's not a performer. She was probably the weakest of the
entire group, and I hope she goes tomorrow night.

Matt: He's lovely! He has a gorgeous voice and he's seems super sweet, but it was just like a repeat of his semi-final performance. He should have ventured out into another direction and blown us all out of our seats; instead, he stayed in comfortable territory. He did a good job, but whether or not it was good enough is a big question mark.

Rebekah: She's stuck to sad, bittersweet r&b kind of ballads all the way through the competition and it's worked well for her - I was hoping she would do something different tonight and show us some
versatility. Unfortunately, she did not and disappointed me. Her voice was weak, she couldn't be heard over the band and some of her notes were veeery questionable. Like the judges, I still love her, but tonight was definitely disappointing.

Rob: He's a legend! Didn't love him before tonight's show, but he really showed us what he's made of. Awesome performance; he was comfortable, he was natural, he moved, he sang well, everything went
right. He's the only Melbourne representative and he sure did us proud. GO, MILLSEY!

Cosima: The fact that this girl has a brilliant voice has never been disputed; I didn't buy her sexual/sensual thing last week with 'Predictable' but tonight she bought me. I loved her. She's not the best-looking girl in the world but she's absolutely sexy and her performance tonight rocked.

Peter: Meh. He's never really done it for me - he has a nice voice but it's boring. He's boring. His performances are boring. I've always really had difficulty imagining him as the Australian Idol, and tonight he proved to me why. His voice didn't suit the song and he's just... flat. I think he'll be going home tomorrow night.

Cle: She's an awesome performer but not a great singer. She moved well on-stage, interacted with the audience well, all that kind of jazz, but her voice was lacking and to me, she was constantly straining to hit notes. I don't think that's the best she can do and
hopefully, she'll stay on and get another chance to prove herself.

Guy: I love Guy! He's awesome. The judges didn't like his performance tonight, but personally, I really enjoyed it. He's got an awesome voice and he's a good performer - he looks like he really enjoys himself on-stage. I'm definitely going to be rooting for this guy all
the way through the competition; he kicks ass.

Kelly: I've really, really disliked Kelly with a passion ever since her semi-final round when she thought she was all that, but tonight, she grew on me in a major way. Awesome choice of song, suited her voice, and she executed it really well. Really stood out from the rest of the group.

Shannon: He's got a lovely voice, and he seems like a lovely person. I can understand his appeal, but I don't really see him winning this competition. Tonight's performance was decent, but not great - and when compared to some of the others, veeery forgetable. However, I highly doubt he'll be going home tomorrow night - or any time soon.

Paulini: This girl rocks. Her voice is absolutely amazing and she performed her ass off tonight. There was worry that she may have been lacking in the personality department before now, but she really showed us what she's made of tonight. She brought it, and she brought
it good.

[evy]

The 70's theme, made the choice of songs rather hard, but I think some of the contestants just didn't consider the fact that they were performing in front of a LIVE audience. There are two options you need to consider when performing in front of a crowd, either :
1. sing a really slow song with precise execution, passion and diva-like voice to keep audience in suspense. OR
2. A really up-beat song to involve the crowd.
(...and nothing in between. It's a no go!)

I think the 2nd option won out last night....the other contestants on the otherhand really had no clue what they were doing - a real dissapointment.

I missed out on Levi's performance (damn!) so I can't say much on his performance.

major highlights of last nights show:

Millsie- Loved him! he can't sing that well, but yesturdays song chioce really suited his voice and his performance was very entertaining and energetic.

I thought Cosima left a really good impression on me, terrific singing and performance. I really thought that no-one could beat that - until along came...

Paulini!! She was absolutely brilliant, it was a great way to end last nights show! Go Paulini!

Evy

[Pinkline Jones]

Let's get this straight - Millsy is struggling as a singer - he has other attributes to try to offset this problem but for my money not enough - his voice can be heard in average karaokes across the country. The chicks shouldn't let their hysterical admiration get in the way of REALITY - we've seen some cool post chicken dance moves but in many instances this has simply been a mask to average singing. The Pig farmer is definitely worth another chance despite last night's disaster because he's a far superior singer to most of them given the right song choice.

[Pinkline Jones]

Kayti,

Matt's performance was pretty bad - he did NOTHING with his voice at all. It was a sickly unimaginative mess. Just to get my point across why not attend a David Gates concert - think he's out here now or soonish - you will soon hear what I'm talking about.

PINKLINE

[evy]

I agree with you Pink...BUT c'mon you have to admit that in terms of performance standard, last night Millsy did win out in comparison to our pigfarmer.

Millsy isn't a fantastic singer (karaoke standard) but IF he keeps up with the yesturdays standard of performance - the teeny boppers will vote him as the australian idol, regardless of whateva the REALITY is. No the chicks shouldn't let their hysterical admiration get in the way, but the truth is that is exactly what they'll do.

Peter should definitely have another chance, but yesturdays performance just proved that there are major limitations to this guys singing. This will be a problem since this is the very thing we base our votes on.

[kayti]

I agree about Millsey - if he keeps turning in crowd-pleasing performances like his performance last night, he'll go far in this competition. However, personally, while I will continue to enjoy his performances on the show, I wouldn't buy his album should he win. His voice is too average. On the other hand, if Cosima, Paulini, Guy or Levi released an album, I would be first in line.

Pinkline - I've never heard the original version of the song that Matt performed. Maybe you're right and he butchered it, but as far as I knew, I enjoyed it, and I still think Matt is sweet and has a lovely voice.

[Pinkline Jones]

Evy,

I agree with you regarding Rob's performance - it was far better than the Pigmeister's last night for sure. No argument.
Yes and unfortunately you're right - despite what I think the young girls will probably vote in someone like Rob in preference to someone who is a far superior singer - it will be interesting to see who we end up with. What really gets me is the judges though - I cannot follow them - one week they talk about the need to raise the bar then we have last night's show where certain performers were below par yet Marcia especially says absolutely nothing. I love Marcia don't get me wrong - but I also have the right to criticise inconsistency too. As far as Holden goes - we need a special English text translation at the bottom of our screens cause I cannot understand what he's on about half the time.


Kayti,

Good on you - you're entitled to like what you like that's fine - I'm not saying that Matt butchered the song - just didn't think it was good enough compared to the rest of the performers. Buy a Bread album and you'll hear David Gates's voice - David Gates hasn't got a strong strong voice but he has a special quality that endeared him to millions of music lovers - and a stack of good songs to back him up.

[Evy]

The judges have finally lost their plot.

I think it's the whole LIVE audience factor is cramming their style. The judges appear to be fighting over the role of being the "nice" guy when in front of a live audience. The comments have majorly mellowed down and most of the time they've got nothing!

Dicko is the most consistent, but even his comments have been less straight-forward. He shouldn't let the boo-ing and ahh-ing of the audience affect him.

Marcia - I have a great respect for her, but her comments have become redundant, all the contestant have been described as "lovely" or some variation to that. What happened to her valuable suggestions and improvements we are so use to hearing? Whether it's the LIve audience factor or her closeness to the contestants that's fogging up her true judgement, who knows!

Mark - this guy isn't really himself...trying too hard to be the "nice" guy in comparison to Dicko. It's not working! and yes there is a definite need for an english text translation.

[CulpBZ]

Anyone here tired of the negative energy that is projected in Bek's performances? Sorry, but I think she totally blew her Wild Card on Sunday night.

She's also being manipulative by now quoting the judges "I meant what I sang!"

Sorry, I can't relate to your single mother plight and feel nothing for you, bring some entertainment back like Courtney the trans so we can have some fun instead of having our "souls touched" by someone who is stuck in some type of deep depression.

[DanniiBoy]

Culp, I've got to agree with you. Bek is becoming nothing more than a one-trick pony and look how far that got Matt.

The first few times I heard Bek, I thought she was mellow and sad, but now she's just getting annoying. It's a lovely voice, but the insistence on "Music to slash your wrists by" is getting tired.

[kayti]

It pains me to say it because I've been a huge supporter of Bek from the beginning, but yes... She's starting to come across as a bit of a one-trick pony and I think she knows her performance on Sunday was mediocre and that she really was very lucky to have escaped elimination this week.

Hopefully she will take this as a lesson to up her game a bit next week, and show a bit of versatility, because she's failed to do that so far. Her sad r&b ballads have taken her this far, but people are getting bored.

People like Cosima, Paulini, Levi and Millsey have started to up their game and show us what they're really made and capable of, and Bek had better do the same thing, or she'll be next out after Lauren.

[Mo]

I think if millsy does win as the polls are currently predicting it will be because of his charisma not his vocal ability. He does have that robbie williams charm but maybe not the undercurrent of menace that robbe has, who I think doesn't have the most fanastic voice in the world either(remember he was a boy band member). but he has won fans with his style and personality.
Personally I liked what he did but thought Paulini and Cosima much better. I suppose they will all do well out of it anyway. There were a few dissapointments Guy, Bek, Laurenwho looked liked she was ready for the men in white coats to take her away, she didn't need all that make up either. I think it might be a hard ask for such a young girl. Peter did undersing the song I thought he could've done better. Liked Levi even though he hasn't appealed to me before...maybe I'm too old but i can see how he would appeal, not bad.

[Pinkline Jones]

Well put Mo